Posted by Victoria Atkinson White on November 21, 2007:

My Darling Ava, You were only 15 months old when your Great Grandfather, “Gramps” died. I will always consider it a great tragedy that you did not get to know him the way I did. But, one of my greatest aspirations in life will be that you see the best of him reflected in me. I want to share just a few memories and stories about him. TUMPED: It is not a real word but I didn’t know that until I used it in the company of others and they looked at me in a strange way. All of your Van Auken aunts and uncles will know what it means- it was a word we used as children with Gramps when he would take us out in the inflatable boats in the ocean on family beach trips. Gramps would position the boat so that we would experience the thrill of almost being thrown out of the boat, but would be just before the peak of the wave so we rarely were thrown head over feet in the water. As each wave seemed to get bigger and bigger and we thought we were going further and further out to sea, we would shout and laugh, “Gramps! Don’t let us get tumped!” In the same way Gramps wanted us to be risk takers- to experience life to the fullest- but do to it safely – riding the peaks of the waves for fun but doing it with someone’s watchful feet planted safely on the ground beneath the water. ICE CREAM: Whenever we would go for summer visits, Gramps would pile all the grandchildren in the car at take us to either Dunkin Donuts or Baskin Robbins. We never wanted for anything- he let us get samples of however many flavors it took before we made our selections- he had incredible patience with us. I remember one time getting a scoop of bubble gum ice cream beneath a scoop of mint chocolate chip. He just laughed and handed me my interesting selection. Gramps never wanted us to be without anything- he sacrificed for those he loved. He encouraged living in the moment. He wanted us to try a little of everything and then flourish in the choices that made us happiest. He loved hearing about how we came to make our choices and how they worked out for us. THE RED SOX: Gramps truly believed that whether or not he watched a Red Sox game on television had an impact on the outcome of the game. He was a fan – a true fan. Gramps was loyal when things were good and when things were really bad. He waited and waited for them to win the World Series. I remember him using the phrase, “Reverse the curse before the hearse.” He wanted to see them win just once before he died. They won it all in 2004, the year Nina died. I remember your Oma, my mom, saying that Nina went up to heaven and told God it was time to let the Red Sox win one for Gramps. They also won in 2007, just after Gramps died. The night they won, your Uncle Douglas texted your Oma two simple words that said it all, “For Gramps.” FUNNY PHRASES: Gramps would talk to himself when he was concentrating or frustrated. Some of my favorite phrases of his are: Step over toe hold, doubled and kipped ~ Up Down and Around ~ Gonna get knee lifted ~ Genial George, Fighting Phil, Dirty Dalton, Thank You Bill ~ Thank you very much, Bill, Awfully good of you, Bill ~ Gonna get clobbered ~ That’ll put hair on your chest ~ Seek executive guidance ~ Gonna take a package on ~ You can do better than that ~ Gives you sense of accomplishment and achievement ~ Gonna have a ball ~ Your Gramps was a man of abundance- he wanted you to have it all. He gave everything he had or he gave nothing. Everything was worth trying- and trying hard. He worked hard, played hard, loved hard, slept hard, and lived hard. At times he was made of steel, and with the change of the wind he was weak as thread. He adored you. He would hold you in his arms and say you are beautiful and say you are the future. He had so many pictures of you and your aunts and uncles in his room. The very last time I saw him, he was asking about you. He loved you. And now, by faith, I know he has joined your Nina in the amazing cloud of witnesses in heaven that watch over you, cheer for you, root for you, pray for you, encourage you, are proud of you, and most of all, love you. His body is not here, but his blood runs through your veins. I hope you grow up with his courage, his strength, his love for family, his wit, his intelligence, and his dedication to those around him. He was one of the most humble and caring men I know- and I am most thankful that he cared for you. There are so many other things I want to share with you about Gramps- I think I have enough memories for bedtime stories as long as you want to hear them, all of them starring a wonderful man who lived a grand life right up to the very end, but this is enough for now. While I am very sad that he is gone, please don’t ever be afraid to talk about your Gramps or ask me or anyone else questions about him. Talking about him is how we keep his memory alive. Talking about him is how we remember the great things about his life and figure out ways to do them in ours. My Darling Ava, you were very blessed to know your Gramps and I know he felt blessed to know you. Love, Mommy

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