Clifford Joseph Fralen

West Point, 1955

Be Thou At Peace

Posted by Jay Duffy on March 22, 2016:

Delivered on August 12, 2015 at West Point, NY Funeral Reception The day after Poppy died, I was floating alone on a tube in the middle of a very still pond. As I paddled, ripples made their way from my fingers, out in every direction, all the way to the edges of the pond. Even when I was no longer moving, the ripples were still traveling. I was struck, that even though Poppy is no longer physically here, I can still see the ripples of his life in mine. And I do. Everyday. Whether it's in the students getting off at the Ruggles stop to study in buildings he directed the creation of or in the stars and stripes he defended over his twenty year of service. Or the silly memories that pop into my head all the time. Like the time I was living with him and Nean right after college, and missed the train to Boston on my first day of work, so he drove around traffic, in the breakdown on 95 to get me to the office on time. Or when on the way to or from our adventures, when my brother and I were little, he would point to a field of horses and say "hey guys, look at all those cows" and leave us in stitches. Or one of my favorite jokes I made up when I was three: what is grey and white and pink all over? -- Poppy's head. Or the time Poppy gave me his air medal because I was afraid of flying. Poppy and his high fives were always there, whenever any of us reached milestones big or small, and even though he won't be there to share those moments with Ava and Jack, it brings me peace to know that they are here, because he was. He continues to live within each of our hearts, none more than Neans. Last year I was asked, very last minute to give a speech at a wedding. Nean and Poppy's love has warmed and inspired all of us for most, if not all, of our lives, so I immediately called her for advice -- because we all know she wouldn't let Poppy answer the phone. She said -- for us, love and marriage has been easy. People say that you need to have your own life and maintain your individuality, but that never worked for us, we've always been better together. It's become very clear to me over the past month that you are still together. He lives so clearly and brightly in you. When I am with you I feel waves of Poppy, not just ripples. As I sat by that pond a month ago, a hawk flew over me, and I was comforted by the overwhelming feeling that Poppy was completely free, as the bird slowly disappeared into the distance. I would like to close by reading a poem by a Vietnamese Buddhist monk that has given me ease: This body is not me I am not limited by this body I am life without boundaries I have never been born And I have never died Look at the ocean and the sky filled with stars, Manifestations from my wondrous true mind Since before time I have been free Birth and death are only doors thru which we pass Sacred threshold on our journey Birth and death are a game of hide and seek So laugh with me Hold my hand Let us say goodbye Say goodbye to meet again soon We meet today We will meet again tomorrow We will meet at the source every moment We meet each other in all forms of life So long Poppy.

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