Posted by Gregory M. Buchalter on October 7, 2025:

My name is Greg Buchalter and John Hocker was my Father-in-law. How many of you here today can look back over your life and say that you were privileged to have known -- and known well - a genuinely good man or woman? It has been my privilege to have known John for most of my life. Our family just spent our first Christmas without him -- the void he has left in our hearts will take some time to heal. The arc of my life and John's life first intersected in the fall of 1988 upon meeting him and Barbara in Bethesda, MD while I was attending medical school. I was dating their daughter, Connie, whom I later married in May of 1990. During that courtship, I was introduced to a career military family -- a family quite unlike my own -- at the time, John was a retired US Army Full Bird Colonel -- He had been an Airborne-Infantry Officer -- he was an honor graduate of West Point -- he was an Olmsted Scholar - this was a family that spoke of assignments in NC, Monterrey, CA, Paris, Cambodia/Thailand, Belgium, Germany, West Point, and the Pentagon -- a family in which each member spoke multiple languages -- a family that were each highly educated -- and a family that were people of deep Christian faith. Talk about being intimidated! What I soon learned was that people raised in America's Heartland -- as were John and Barbara -- are generally some of the kindest, most affable, and hospitable people you will find -- and they were no exception. These 30+ years have been filled with so many great memories with Barbara and John. Here are some highlights -- while living in SLC during my residency training in the early 90s, 4 successive Thanksgivings and Christmas' were spent with them along with my brother in law Guy. Multiple summer vacations around America with them and our family -- Cape Cod was one of our favorites -- Chatham in particular -- seeing great local theater -- eating scrumptious seafood at the Swan River Restaurant -- dancing to America's music with them and our children around the Chatham Gazebo - the Outer Banks of NC and Edisto Island, SC, Rocky Mountain National Park, Santa Barbara, CA -- Getting to see President George W. Bush present the National Medals of Science and Technology in the White House in 2004 courtesy of an invitation from John when he was the Executive Director of the National Science and Technology Medals Foundation -- John's third career! - and, finally, one of my favorite set of trips was with Connie and I joining Barbara and John on 4 recent excursions to Europe over an 8 year span -- to Germany, Italy, and France. They were so easy to be with and travelled much younger than their age would imply. There were not many places that they had not visited in Europe so it was a challenge to find new regions to explore. Connie and I have three adult children -- Allison, Ryan, and Cameron. They are here with us today -- including Allison's husband Sam, and Ryan's fiancé, Molly. The deep and abiding faith in Christ that I first recognized in Barbara and John became wholly manifest in how they treated our children as their grandparents. While we lived in SLC, Scottsdale, Shreveport, and Colorado Springs, we felt very connected to them. They were truly invested in the lives of all their grandchildren. As they were able, they visited us and attended school functions, concerts, plays, and graduation ceremonies. They watched our children so that Connie and I could travel to Europe -- me, for the first time. Their care and concern was genuine -- their generosity was endearing -- and their demonstration of Christ-like virtues will, no doubt, profoundly impact our children throughout their lives. For this, Connie and I are most grateful. There are a number of things I will miss about John -- he was always the first one up in the morning with fresh-brewed coffee ready to go -- like a Folgers commercial -- Always seeing him with a crossword or Suduko puzzle nearby, keeping his mind sharp -- he was always well dressed -- he was a Khaki slacks and Brooks Brothers dress shirt guy -- I don't think I ever saw him wear a pair of blue jeans -- I will miss hearing "Hey Greg, did I ever tell you about.....?" He was chock full of great war stories -- about West Point, about new-fangled parachutes, about Viet Nam, about Cambodia, about unique things he ate in Cambodia, about elephants, about Camp Crosley in Indiana - about the famous people he interacted with -- how he met Barbara in Bamberg -- his black Porche , and other stories. I will miss his consistency -- his kind manner of speech -- his inquisitiveness about my life and profession -- his affability -- his contentment -- his laughter -- his temperance and his devotion to his wife, Barbara. John knew Jesus Christ as his personal Lord and Savior -- this I understood when I first met him 30+ years ago -- over these years, our family has had many great conversations re faith, the person of Jesus Christ, the bible, heaven, ... and for as long as I knew him, he attended this church - he loved this church. He loved the preaching and teaching, the worship, the Pastor's class and the tasty snacks available in the Pastor's class!! Many of his closest friends also attended here. He served as an Elder and headed up the New Members Committee with Barbara for more than 20+ years. He was a true servant and I know his life was richer for being a part of Fourth Presbyterian Church. I remember the day -- March 3rd -- 2020 - when Connie and I received the news that John was diagnosed with a brain tumor. We soon understood that his disease was not curable and that, short of a God miraculously healing him, we would only have him for a short time. Connie spent the better part of March, April, and May living with Barbara and John to help care for him. In mid-May, we brought John out to live with us in Colorado Springs. Hospice Care was instituted and we focused on good meals, adequate rest, daily walks, and ending each night with a hymn or two -- which, for quite a while, John joined in from memory -- courtesy of Fourth Presbyterian Church. Guy was able to join us for extended stays which was wonderful for us and, certainly, for John and Barbara. Near the end, it was very hard for us to see him so diminished mentally and physically. But John belonged to the Lord and I am greatly comforted with these words from Paul in his first letter to the church in Thessalonica -- "Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him." That was John's hope -- and that is our hope. It brings our family a great sense of peace to know that we will one day see John again -- healthy and whole. In Yiddish, there is a word used to describe a very good man - a decent, admirable person with many good qualities. The word is Mensch -- and John Hocker was truly a Mensch - Today, we celebrate the life of John Hocker - A life very well-lived -- a life of purpose -- a life of devotion -- to God, to his family -- and to his country. He was a great father in law and a wonderful grandfather - My children are better people for having him in their lives for so long and I, too, am a better man for having known him. He was the kindest and most humble man I have ever known. Connie and I and our family look forward to a reunion with him in heaven. Rest in peace, John

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